Cannibal Ducks You Say?
by dahhling
Summary: Will tried to create a race of cannibal ducks. What if he suceeded? What if they mutated and are eating humans? Clary and Jace must defeat them with the help of a new friend. COOKIES IF YOU GUESS WHO!  Rated T for language  warning- this is very cracked u
1. Chapter 1

Ch. 1

Clary Fray was sitting in her room at the New York Institute, sketching her boyfriend, Jace, by the moonlight, for what seemed like the millionth time. She found that she could never get his face right no matter how many times she tried. As she lightly drew the beginning of the hairline she heard the door open. _Speak of the devil_, she thought. "Hey, Clary, what are you drawing?" Jace asked.

"Is it really your business?" she asked, suddenly embarrassed. He had caught her drawing him before and teased her constantly about it.

"Let's see, if you won't willingly show me then I will have to get it myself" he said with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Oh no you don't" Clary began but Jace had already began to move. He jumped onto her bed and got behind her then tickled her until she dropped her sketchpad. _Last time I ever tell anyone I am ticklish there…_ Clary thought and tried to grab her sketchpad but Jace's quickness could be matched by nearly nobody and he had it before she even reached for it.

"Oh, my perfection again, Clary? This is getting a bit obsessive, isn't it. Maybe we need to take you to a psychiatrist for that." He taunted, holding the book. Clary reached back for it but Jace was flipping through the pages and didn't look like he was going to give it up. He was looking at a picture she had drawn at Central Park one day. It was of some geese and a pond. Jace took out the pencil that was clipped onto the binding of the sketchpad. "Hey, I bet I can draw like that too!" Jace declared and set to work drawing a… Clary couldn't figure out what Jace was drawing. She could see it perfectly fine but Jace wasn't Van Gough to say the least. It looked like a kitchen spoon on top of a box with flippers.

"Umm Jace? Sorry to interrupt your artistic rampage but may I ask what in the Angel's name is that?" Clary asked

"It's a duck!" Jace exclaimed, looking insulted but Clary knew he was just pretending. Jace was rarely insulted by anything and if anybody tried to insult him he usually just made a joke out of it. Clary was about to make a response comparing Jace's drawing skills to those of a real duck when a rune flashed across her mind, like ink splats on pure white paper. "Clary? Daydreaming of me again?" Jace teased but Clary was too busy concentrating on the rune to be annoyed. "Clary?" Jace repeated, with real concern.

"Give me the sketchpad." Clary said, in a way that she would have normally described as scary calm but right now she needed to concentrate. Jace gave her the sketchpad, looking confused. She etched the rune next to Jace's drawing and it rose up on the paper, glowed once, and then fell like a deep breath. Clary and Jace watched in amazement as Jace's poor duck drawing turned amazingly realistic but then morphed into a morbid but slightly amusing picture of a duck eating a person then it became smaller and smaller but multiplied until about 100 ducks eating people were on the paper, covering Clary's earlier goose drawing.

"Wow." Jace said. This was saying something as Jace was never the one to show amazement, more the one that someone said Wow about.

"Exactly what I thought. What does it mean?" Clary asked. She had made runes before but never one like this. "It made the picture good-"

"Are you saying it wasn't good in the first place?" Jace interjected.

"Yes Jace, it was the most amazing duck picture I had ever seen in my life" Clary said sarcastically. "Well it made it good, and then it turned morbid. It couldn't possibly be predicting the future, could it? It's so weird. Ducks eating people! What in the world does it mean?" she repeated, frustrated.

Jace, who had looked lost in thought began to speak but was interrupted by the sound of a church bell that was the summoning bell. He and Clary looked outside to see a girl, about their age at the Institute's door. She had long brown hair that fell in curls down to her waist and she was wearing a striped blue and white blouse with a long blue skirt. She was also wearing a strange pendant around her neck that neither Jace nor Clary could make out from the second story of the Institute.

Clary looked at Jace, even more confused than before. The girl wasn't pale enough to be a vampire, had no visible warlocks mark, and the werewolves were all wolf right now because of the full moon. If she were a shadowhunter, she could get in easily enough by herself. She couldn't be a mundane because they can't see the Institute. _Who knows, maybe she's a warlock and had a tail under that skirt. It's not like it hasn't happened before. _"Does she look familiar to you?"

"No. Come on," He said, standing up. "Let's go meet a new friend! Maybe she knows about these mysterious ducks" laughing, he held out his arm and Clary took it.


	2. Chapter 2

Ch. 2

Clary and Jace went down the Institute's elevator impatiently. They both wanted to figure out who this mystery guest was. When they finally got to the front door, Clary looked at Jace for a bit of encouragement and was answered with a quick peck on the lips. Clary blushed and thought, "_Am I ever going to get used to that?_"

They opened the doors and Clary finally got a good look at the girl. Her skin was the color of cream, her eyes a very pretty but steady blue grey. They looked very old and wise. The pendant that Clary couldn't see through the window was an angel with wings folded, holding a sword. It looked like something she would love to sketch. She wasn't sure, but she thought that she could hear a slight ticking noise coming from it and couldn't help but wonder where she got it from. The girl was definitely not a vampire or werewolf but mundanes couldn't see through the heavy glamours covering the Institute.

Clary's thoughts were interrupted by the girl's words, "Hello. My name is Tessa Gray and I have news of great importance to Shadowhunters. May I come in?" She was strangely formal, like Raphael and some of the older vampires Clary had met.

"Of course, Tessa. But first, would you mind telling me what species you are?" Clary said, copying her formality.

"The most accurate description would be a warlock. And you are…?" Tessa asked. Clary was so confused by the wording of the first sentence that she didn't hear the second. Luckily, Jace, not fazed by anything answered.

"I'm Jace Herondale and this is my girlfriend, Clary Fray." He looked very thoughtful and Clary wondered what was going on in his head.

Tessa smiled. "I used to know a Herondale very, very well. I can see the family resemblance."

Clary could see that this Herondale that Tessa knew was not just a friend. She wondered how many greats she would have to put in front of grandfather to show the relationship that man had to Jace.

She opened the door and allowed Tessa to enter along with Jace, who looked amused now. "_It must have to do with the fact she mentioned his family."_ Clary thought. Jace led the girls into the kitchen where they sat down at the table.

"Now," Jace said. "Why don't you tell us what you came here for?"

"So," Tessa started "I was born approximately 170 years ago here in New York. My brother, Nathaniel, was working in London for a very evil man that went by the name of the Magister. The Magister tricked me into coming to London where I was kidnapped by the Dark Sisters who forced me to learn my power which is to turn into people and touch their thoughts but that is a story for another time. I escaped from the Dark Sisters with the help of your," she looked at Jace, "great, great, grandfather, Will Herondale. He took me to the London Institute where I lived for quite some time. Will was a very… interesting person. He and his parabatai, Jem Carstairs, went to Hyde Park one day. Will convinced Jem to feed poultry pie to the mallard ducks there, resulting in them unknowingly creating a race of cannibal ducks. This may sound insane but-"

Clary interrupted her, "I'm sorry, did you say cannibal ducks?" She looked at Jace who then gave her a look of disbelief.

"Yes I did" Tessa looked confused at their silent exchange.

"And did these ducks eat people by any chance?" Jace asked, half expecting her to disappear in a poof of smoke.

"I was getting to that." Tessa said. By now, Jace and Clary were both about to explode with questions but wanted to hear the rest of the story. "That was, granted, a long time ago but these ducks have mutated. I can't exactly explain how but I'm pretty sure it involves global warming and excessive sugar on a certain author's part. Either way, now, these ducks are killing innocent people. It began in London but nobody reported it because who would believe that ducks are eating people? I have heard from a certain source that they are coming to America. They are swimming across the Atlantic Ocean as we speak. I would guess that by now they are 1/3 of the way done. These mutations made the ducks not only hungry for humans but they are now stronger, faster, and more vicious than normal ducks. They could wipe cities in a week. It would be devastating."

At this point, a million things were going through Clary's mind at once but the first question that she thought to ask was, "Well why are you telling us about it?"

"I assume you know Magnus Bane, correct?" She asked, pausing for a second to gauge their reaction. "He was living in London at the same time I was. We were, are actually, good

friends. I came here to warn him and he told me about you and the others at this Institute. He said it would be a good idea to talk to you about this."

"Why isn't he here with you then?" Jace inquired.

"He had 'special' plans with Alec Lightwood." she said, looking at him carefully.

"Well what a visual that brings" Jace said, rolling his eyes.

"You remind me so much of Will." Tessa said, more to herself than anyone else.

"So what should we do about these ducks? Would the Clave believe this story?" Clary asked.

"I don't think so. We need to get Isabelle, Alec, Simon, and maybe we can get a message to Aline." Jace said thoughtfully.

"I think I could convince Luke and his pack would follow if I had showed the drawing-"

"I'm terribly sorry but would you mind explaining this drawing?" Tessa interjected.

Clary explained the events that had happened before Tessa had come, leaving out the kiss and the tickling. There are some things that not everyone needs to know. Tessa looked very thoughtful the entire time and but didn't look surprised when Clary explained the rune.

"Yes, I know about your power. I was at the battle in Idris when the wards were down. I can't say I'm surprised that you have been creating other new runes as well." Tessa said, to Clary's surprise.

"So how many of these ducks did your source say were coming?" Jace asked. Clary suspected that he was already planning battle strategy.

"I would say about 150 but they breed like rabbits so by the time they raid the city it could be 500."

"500?" Clary exclaimed, looking very distressed.

"Come on Clary, they are ducks, how hard could it be?" Jace replied.

"These ducks are strong, they can fly, they are vicious, and they eat human flesh like Cheetos!" Clary said, her voice getting higher and higher as she spoke.

"What's this about vicious, man-eating ducks?" said a smooth voice as a familiar tall, Amazonian, figure with a long ribbon of black hair stepped out from behind the corner.


	3. Chapter 3

Ch.3

"Isabelle!" Clary exclaimed. Isabelle had left about an hour ago to go demon hunting. "What are you doing back so soon?" Normally, Isabelle's hunts lasted a few hours at the least.

"I was fighting a Shax demon but I ran out of weapons so I came back for more. Now I think that my explaining is done because obviously you have much more to do. Who is that girl and what the fuck are these cannibal ducks you are talking about?" Isabelle said, running her hand through her hair then resting it on her hip.

"My name is Tessa Gray," Tessa began. She told Isabelle the whole story of Will and Jem feeding poultry pie to the ducks causing a race of cannibal ducks that mutated to become man-eating. The only part she left out was the drawing and the rune.

Isabelle looked at Tessa as if she was insane. "Don't tell me you believe this crazy girl! She says that she is a warlock but do you see a warlocks mark? I doubt there is a tail under that skirt of yours." She said, eerily repeating Clary's earlier thought.

"I am not a normal warlock. A better word for what I am is Eidolon or shape changer. I can change into other people and touch their thoughts. My mother was a mundane and my father was a demon. That is all I know." Tessa explained.

"Shape changer or whatever I don't believe you. This doesn't make any more sense than when Jace-"They wouldn't ever know what Jace did because Clary interjected,

" But Isabelle, before Tessa came Jace had drawn a normal duck in my sketchbook. I then saw a rune. Not one from the Gray Book, if you know what I mean. I etched it onto the side of the drawing and it turned the drawing realistic, then it turned into hundreds of ducks, eating people. And remember Izzy, this was before Tessa arrived." Clary clarified.

"Ok fine, let's say that there are man-eating ducks coming for us. What can we do to stop them? Make a giant loaf of bread and catapult it into the ocean?" Izzy said, rolling her eyes.

"You know," Jace began "If you were to make the bread, my dear sister, the ducks would not only go away as fast as they could, all living things within 5 miles would too."

"Shut up Jace. I'd like to see you cook." Isabelle dared.

"Actually, I would too." Clary said. "Has Jace ever cooked once in his life?"

"And we are getting off topic ladies" Jace interjected. "I promise that I will cook a 5 star dinner once we get this duck problem figured out."

"Yes," Tessa said "We need to plan. Jace, how many Shadowhunters can you call on to help?"

"Well, we can get me, Clary, Isabelle, Alec, and maybe Aline, but we have friends that aren't Shadowhunters as well. We can get a whole pack of werewolves because Clary's stepdad is the pack leader. If we convince him, we can get them all. We also have a daylighter vampire named Simon who is Clary's best friend." Jace listed thoughtfully.

"I'm dreadfully sorry," Tessa began "but I don't know the current terms. What is a daylighter?"

"It's a vampire who can go out in the sun." Izzy explained, still sounding a bit hostile.

"And I bet that if Alec goes into battle, Magnus won't be far behind." Clary thought out loud.

"What makes you say that?" Jace inquired.

"If I decided to go into battle, wouldn't you follow me, especially if it was that dangerous?"

"Granted" He said, with a half-smile on his face. Clary gave him a peck on the cheek.

"Get a goddamn room" Isabelle muttered, remembering the time that she caught them this close to having sex on a brick wall next to a coffee shop.

Jace gave her a look that shot daggers.

"Now when do you think that the ducks will be coming?" Clary asked, still blushing from the kiss.

"My source can see into the future. He saw them arriving at the beach in 2 days, maybe less." Tessa said, embarrassed to give them so little time.

"2 days?" Jace asked, looking not as delirious as others would look, more as if it were a challenge he felt needed to be faced.

"We need to talk to Luke now."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

"I can portal us there now" Clary said, reaching for her stele. "Oh, I think I dropped my stele upstairs. Jace, can I use yours?"

"Go ahead" He said, holding it out to her.

"I'd prefer to do this outside. Last time I did this inside Maryse yelled at me for marking up the floors" Clary explained, opening up the side door. She kneeled down on the ground and began marking the runes to make a portal.

"I thought that only warlocks could make portals" Tessa whispered to Jace.

"Is it really all that surprising, considering all the other things she can do?" Jace asked, rhetorically.

They heard the Institute door open.

"For the love of the Angel," Izzy began "It must be Maryse. I'm going to stall her. You get Luke!"

At this point, Clary had finished marking the runes and the door had appeared. "Luke is at his house right now so think of that and Tessa; you have never been there so I need for you to hold onto me." She held out her hand.

Tessa took it.

They stepped through the portal onto Luke's doorstep. Clary grabbed the spare key from the dying potted fern next to the door. They walked in and Clary yelled, "Luke! I'm back! I need to talk to you!"

"I'm right here, no need to yell." Luke was behind them. "I was just checking out this scratch on my truck. Some idiot tried to park to close to me at the grocery store. Who's your friend?" He asked, looking pointedly at Tessa.

"My name is Tessa Gray," Tessa began to tell her story for the third time, not leaving out Clary's drawing beforehand.

"Clary, is this true?" Luke asked, looking distressed.

"Yea Luke, I'm pretty sure it is. That's the reason we came here. We need you and your pack's help in fighting these things. If your pack were to help we would have a much better chance at winning." Clary said.

"Clary, if I were to let you go off to face 500 man eating ducks alone, I wouldn't be much of a step-father. Of course I am going to help you. When did you say this was?"

"In 2 days." Jace spoke for the first time.

"Not much of a warning there. What can I do to prepare?"

"Well you can-" They wouldn't find out what Luke could do because the bushes rumbled behind them and a duck the size of ¾ of Jace with real sharp teeth in its bill and fangs. It had razor sharp wings and it was extremely muscular. Jace grabbed a seraph blade and threw it at Clary then took one out for him. "Its name is Malik" Jace yelled, "Israzel!" The blade light up and Jace tried to cut off the head but it only sliced the chest. Clary had never seen Jace miss a target.

"Malik!" Clary screamed. The creature was too busy lunging at Jace to notice her. She managed to slice off its wings and as it tried to bite her, Jace cut of its head. The severed head lay there, not disappearing like demons did when you killed them.

"Wow." Luke said. "You really are going to need some help. Jace and Tessa, make sure there are no more of those. Clary, you should call Simon and tell him about this stuff. He would probably help us during the battle."

"Good idea." Clary picked up her cellphone and dialed the familiar number.

"Hello?" Simon answered

"Hey Simon. Ok so I have a really strange story and you have to promise me that you will hear it out ok?"

"After all that's happened in the past year, I have had my fair share of strange stories. I doubt this will be any different. But I will hear you out."

"Ok but it is really weird. So, a few hours ago, Jace drew a horrible sketch of a duck in my sketchbook….." She told him the story, of course excluding the kisses because Simon just did not need to know that.

"I redact my statement about strange stories. So you are telling me that man-eating ducks are coming to New York in 2 days-"

"They may be coming sooner than that. Jace and I just fought one off. They are about half of Jace's size, they have sharp fanglike teeth, they are strong and very fast. The worst part is their numbers. We may have 500 of them to fight off."

"Oh wow. That sounds FUN!" Simon said sarcastically. "And I honestly have nothing better to do so why don't we all meet at Taki's tomorrow morning around 9ish for breakfast. We can discuss battle strategy. Do you think Isabelle can come?"

"Simon, we all know you just want to hit on Isabelle. That fact has been made evident. Are you actually going to help discuss strategy or are you going to hit on Izzy?"

"Maybe a little bit of both." Simon laughed and before Clary could protest he hung up the phone. Tomorrow was going to be a fun day.

A/N- _School restarts tomorrow so I won't be able to give you these kinds of presents (4 updates in a day you lucky bastards) though I may be convinced to update more often with reviews… hint hint hint REVIEWS ARE LOVE :D_


End file.
